Random Thoughts of May

Here we are again friends! It is JUNE 1st! So.. I present to you, my Random Thoughts of May (This is a long one so get ready). Leggo!

I wish I had more female friends… Who lived near me and weren’t so flaky

I don’t think ppl understand that another person’s name is on the line if they referred you

I am a lame

Wanna know why I’m Baeless? BECAUSE I’M A MUTHAFUGGIN UNICORN BITCH! 🦄..
THAT will be my response to the question “why are you single?”

After further review, it has been brought to my attention that I am not lame.. I just don’t care to talk to people I don’t care to be around.
“Bitch what are you doing? You not lame just because you don’t fuck with niggas… bitch get in there and get another drink and enjoy yourself. Fuck them niggas” -Shanade

Boy: *scrolls through IG timeline* oh you one of them girls huh? 😏
Me: 😐 what girls…?
Boy: one of those girls who posts they ass all on IG
Me: not really. But I see yo thirsty was Checkin for it

If you can not reply to me via text in a timely fashion I can not do business with you.

On the lowest of keys, it’s niggas I’m still mad lusty over.. like I know I’m making myself look stupid for being thirsty over this nigga but… idc. I’m kinda psycho so In my mind this nigga is going to respond to my advances (one day) the way I want him too:  willingly smiling,  tongue out, accepting of my sexy love (in the words of ne-yo)

What if I told you I could slurp the mussel  out of the shell without it being open?

Inside tip/spoiler alert/ mayor key/ fun fact: dudes I post on my social media are NOT my man. Never are. I don’t post dudes I’m interested in.. even a little bit. Nope. Not me.

Etcetera etcetera (…) REALLY  means EXTRA EXTRA EXTRA.. you know the extra extra extra so I don’t have to say the extra extra extra 😆😆

Do not Call me a “stranger” trying to be cute. Take this conversation I came to give or stfu and let me go about my day. Because at the most basic level, I am offended you called me something other than my name.

“Trying to moonwalk past the truth does not change reality” -Charlamagne tha god

I’m out here making moves. My niggas putting out visuals I’m in them too.

I hate when someone asks me if I want to smoke then shows up with a skinny ass blunt. Like, WE are not going to get high off this .3 you scrapped into this rello. No more skinny blunts!

No shade to any woman who is a nail tech. I respect your hustle and your craft. But it has been MY PERSONAL experience that Asians  (Taiwanese, Chinese, Vietnamese) and Hispanics/Latinos  (Mexican, Puerto Rican, Dominican) do nails the best. There is one black girl named Angie who has done my nails the absolute best I’ve ever seen and she’s black. BUT I’ve only seen her once. She doesn’t stay in a shop too long but does house calls… I just can’t ever get her to keep an appt with me 😩. So. I continue to go to my #1 spot City Nails on W 25th (in the corner of the plaza at w. 25th & Clark).

White people are waking up. And to those few who BEEN WOKE, thank you. Speak up if you haven’t. Speak LOUDER if you have.

Believe it or not, poor ghetto trash white people understand black people. They will never understand fully because they could never have the melanin. But they understand the struggles of being poor, judged, discriminated against, and limited by societal institutions.

There are so many crooks in Cleveland 😩😓

On the lowest of keys, I am a graphic designer.

Black woman sitting on a bench alone and group of white ppl stand right next to her. This doesn’t seem suspicious? Have you seen Get Out? 🙁😒. You people makin me nervous and need to  get from ’round me

I don’t think anyone’s gaydar goes off on me… but I been pullin mad pretty bitches 😌🤔 what it is hoe? Lmfao (trillville)

Some Jehovah’s witnesses came to my door and talked to me about family. And told me they use the bible to define and manage a family  and showed me a small pamphlet. I’m not about to become a Jehovah’s witness. I’m sound in my own beliefs. But since reading Charlamagne’s book “Black Privilege”, I’m actually interested in what they believe and how it differs from what I believe. I’ll talk to Ruby and Tawana again if they come by.

If you contact me and my response is “who is this? “, don’t respond with “an old friend”. Because my response will be “oh ok” and then you will be blocked. Identify yourself or keep it pushing.

I swear the funniest thing is when a “friend” expresses sexual interest in me and I shut it down… and all of a sudden they’re not my friend anymore. Lol 🤣 cracks me up every time

I wish we could report people dangerously speeding ourselves. Like “911 what’s your emergency?” -“um yes. I’d like to report a person speeding. She was doing way more than 25 in the 25. I know this because it was Coventry and she almost hit me in the crosswalk. License plate EJF 9810.” … yes I’ll hold.

Where… in thee ENTIRE world… do stores regularly stay open past 9pm to where 8:45pm is prime shopping time? Like forreal, who goes shopping after dinner ?? (Except for black Friday)

Don’t look at me sideways because I’m struggling with this weighted rope right now. You ain’t run 2 miles and do 4 ab circuits twice (or 3 times) over. Get back to your bench-presses nigga.

I think my old fling got himself a girl.. good for him.. now if he’d just stop lying to me about it we’d be good 😒😑

Coma mierda

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