Random Thoughts of April

Here we are, May 1st! So its time to share with you my thoughts from April. These thoughts were mostly formulated in the shower (where I do my hands down BEST thinking) and spurts from conversations and experiences. Let me preface this with saying April was a hard month for me. Very hard. But as of last week and especially TODAY, I am feelings much better.. more energized, more positive, more level headed, and more ambitious… and now, I am moving towards progressing and maintaining this mentality.. because great things are beginning to move me in my life and I don’t want to miss or block my blessing all because I was too deep in my bag (in my feelings).

Anywho!! Here ya go: 

I want to go on a vacation. I NEED to go on a vacation.

Should I do a modeling thing forreal? Like make it a part of my career goals?

What is the real point of my website? I wanna sell stuff, write stuff, and get ad $.

I must raise my vibrations.

How can you say you honestly love a child when you don’t respect the child’s mother? Regardless of how she may act or your feelings towards her personally, If you love the child, out of respect for them you would respect and at least acknowledge the mother. Period.

The concept of religion is almost as fluid as sexuality.

If I’m the oldest person on the bus does that mean I can sit in the “seniors and priority seating” section?

If you have my phone number, DO NOT try to have a full conversation with me via Snapchat or Instagram. Text me. Because last time I checked, nobody is paying to replace my burnt out battery BUT ME.

Not everything done in the dark is shameful.

I like drinking . Especially during the day.

When someone talks to me alot and then stops talking to me as often, it makes me think they aren’t interested. And I forget about them.

What’s understood doesn’t have to be explained… maybe that’s my problem. I don’t speak up because you should already know what and how I’m thinking 🤦. In real life, you don’t even know me.

Why do I save numbers anymore?

Perception is reality.

What’s worse; being single and lonely or in a relationship and lonely?

How is it that ppl I haven’t talked to in ages are more concerned about my safety and welfare than the person I’m in a relationship with?

Will power is super power.

I should not be in a relationship right now.

I like the taste of alcohol. This may be a problem.

Don’t believe facts from a fraud.

“Legendary-ness. It’s a word” and ima use it

To Jamal Campbell (aka Killa Cam aka JCam) of Brooklyn/Staten Island, NY: You really hurt my feelings. You hurt my heart pretending to be in love with me and sucking me into your million dollar dream scheme only to throw me away like a gum wrapper…..I don’t believe any of it was real and I hope I never see you again in this lifetime or any of the next lifetimes. I exposed myself to you in ways I never have or would have done to anyone else. But I’m not going to let your sickness ruin my heart. Your karma is going to be horrific and is as certain as death and taxes. But I sincerely wish you nothing but peace, success, and many blessings dear. And I pray that your daughter Madison never has to feel what I felt with you. Adieu.

So is it an unwritten rule that if someone blocks you, you block them back? Lol dumb.

I wish guys wouldn’t send me the same “good morning beautiful” text. It’s like programmed in every guys phone… text me some shit like “good morning Scoundrel” or “good morning boss lady”. Something other than “beautiful” every single day to let me know you payin attention and to keep me on my toes.

Depression and loneliness are very real. If you suffer from depression, tell someone, anyone. They will help you. And if they don’t, they’ll have to answer for that on judgement day. #justwaitonit

I just try to be the friend to you that you are to me.

Parenthood is an amazing blessing. A terrifying life-force sucking blessing. Thank you God.

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